About the Unexpected Little Visitor (dialog)

Trifecta wanted a dialog in exactly 33 words. Not the most pleasant topic, but until we ensure all women have equal access to birth control, this conversation will keep happening, with different outcomes. My hope is birth control for all women who want it, and men who will “man up” and use a condom every time, because the Pill isn’t a 100% guarantee… and there are STDs to consider.  This will also be my submission  to dverse Open Mic Night.  Peace and mindfulness, Amy

About the Unexpected Little Visitor

“I’m pregnant.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes. Thoughts?”

“It’s your body. Do what you want.”

“Funny, it was OUR bodies that night. I’ll book the appointment and send you the bill from my new place.”

© 2013 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil

50 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. leesis
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 02:56:09

    yet again such perfection Amy. xx


  2. vivinfrance
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 03:03:36

    Ouch! Pungent summary


  3. atrm61
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 04:15:34

    Right decision & loved the last one-too good:-)


  4. claudia
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 04:25:25

    ugh…that hurts…dang..you packed much emotions into just a 33 word conversation


  5. Roger Green
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 04:39:52

    Can’t believe we’re still fighting Roe v Wade.


    • Sharp Little Pencil
      Feb 03, 2013 @ 14:59:06

      Funny how you phrased that, Roger, “we,” even though I know what you mean. It’s ridiculous to consider going back to back alleys. There are only FOUR abortion providers in Wisconsin, and now that “concealed carry” laws are in effect, God knows what will happen.


  6. brian miller
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 05:08:21

    nice…that you were able to say so much, not so much on him not taking responsibility you know….tight little bit of dialog…


  7. Lumdog
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 05:44:00

    Great, very real dialogue. I think both of them need to chill for a bit.


  8. coalblack
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 05:45:26

    Er…I don’t think I *need* birth control, do you? ;-)


    • Sharp Little Pencil
      Feb 03, 2013 @ 15:02:05

      Need or deserve? Or are you referring to age, ha ha ha. I’m past menopause but there’s always a chance for some little fuzzy old egg to float down the old tubes, yikes! And birth control is, of course, a RIGHT – for both sides. You don’t see Congress outlawing condoms, do you? (But some churches do…)


  9. deanabo
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 06:01:18

    ugh… This is something that happens way to often. This is terrific!


  10. Libby
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 07:24:55

    AWESOME!!! Great topic and great dialogue. What a good use of your 33 words…


  11. kaykuala
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 08:07:44

    All’s fair in love, so it is, Amy! Voice your concern, voice it hard. Women have rights too! Nicely!



  12. Draug419
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 08:51:27

    We definitely have to make sure conversation about this doesn’t taper off! (: I have high hopes for the recent changes in legislature to help women with birth control access and abortion options.


    • Sharp Little Pencil
      Feb 03, 2013 @ 15:06:12

      Draug, see comment to KayKuala. Hank, Brian, Roger, all you guys who understand the woman’s predicament, kudos to you and bless you. It’s not like any of us go skipping off to the clinic, saying “Oh, goody, today’s the day I get my womb broomed!” The opposite. Agonizing, and unless you are lucky, you may find that your oh=so=kind OB-GYN turns nasty on you over the decision. In which case, they shouldn’t perform them, or refer to another provider. Thanks, Amy


  13. Lafemmeroar
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 10:29:06

    Snappy and clever! Well done. Digging this now :)


  14. El Guapo
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 11:44:41

    Great dialogue!
    Not so much condoms as much as an awareness of consequences.


  15. Corinne
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 12:26:19

    Oh my gosh. I wrote mine on the same subject (sort of). The coldness that some men can show…


  16. memyselfandela
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 14:56:31

    Sad reality… nicely written.


  17. jannatwrites
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 16:22:29

    Dialogue with a powerful statement – very good! Glad she decided to leave the jerk.


  18. christina
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 07:51:17

    i can gather so much about these characters in so few words. nice job!


  19. joetwo
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 13:12:00

    There are always two people in these things.


    • Sharp Little Pencil
      Feb 03, 2013 @ 15:09:12

      Yeah, but only one is left “holding the bag” because the other one didn’t man up and use protection… She will also suffer all the judgment no matter whether she carries to term or not… Thanks, Joe.


  20. Sarah Ann
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 13:28:55

    You summed up the (un)sympathetic partner perfectly. There is so much here in so few words. Well done.


  21. Sharp Little Pencil
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 15:10:49

    TO ALL YOU WONDERFUL FOLKS: Thank you for your comments on one of the most difficult subjects I tackle. It’s easier to write about being bipolar with PTSD, or having survived sexual abuse, than it is to take on the “taboo” of safe, legal abortion. I’m so lucky to have a great readership! AMY


  22. ManicDdaily
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 17:10:43

    Not sure if the unexpected little visitor here is the zygote or what the man has become, etc. The distillation adds to your point! k.


  23. trifectawriting
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 19:45:51

    Nice job with the prompt.


  24. Christine
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 23:18:55

    Wow – serious topic indeed. I really like the woman’s attitude here – her willingness to stand up for herself. Too bad she needed to…


  25. Kim Nelson
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 03:20:21

    My friend, Amy,
    I so often wonder if the generation to which we gave birth realizes the rights and well-being that are at risk. Still appreciate the validity of “keep your laws off my body.”


    • Sharp Little Pencil
      Feb 08, 2013 @ 22:43:49

      “Rights” are often viewed as “Entitlements” by the wealthy. I believe ALL health care, including the unfortunate abortion, should be free for all Americans. And it’s a shame they are so frequent…. always told Riley’s girlfriends: “NEVER tell you boyfriend you are on The Pill.” Now there are more surgical abortions than ever in Wisconsin since they took away the “medical” version (one pill at doctor’s office, another a day later, and you get your period). Thanks for your passion, Kim. Peace, Amy


  26. Sarav
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 16:38:54

    Hi Amy, you are always on that cutting edge–gotta keep beating that drum, or people get complacent–thank you. And it’s amazing how you create such a strong scene in 33 words!


  27. tedstrutz
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 23:43:50

    That was very good.


  28. Josie Two Shoes
    Feb 05, 2013 @ 12:51:52

    My frustration is the frequency that this little problem continues to appear, given the fact that birth control became so easily accesible and relatively reliable as I was coming of age long ago. Not to use protection is not only are careless thought, it is a selfish thought, giving no consideration to the life potentially created, or the possibilty that actions such as the plan outlined may be the end result. Time to grow up and be responsible!


  29. Semaphore / Samuel Peralta
    Feb 05, 2013 @ 22:54:04

    This shows that, in the hands of a deft writer, flash fiction can flesh out characters and put them in situations with implications far beyond the constraints of the word count. Well done!


  30. heidi
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 02:10:54

    Very nice. I agree with previous posts that you have written a complete, intelligent story with very few words. I read it a couple of times over and enjoyed it very much.


  31. Snakypoet (Rosemary Nissen-Wade)
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 07:01:57

    A masterpiece of succinctness!


  32. Blue Flute
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 11:10:34

    Reminds me of an Ernest Hemingway story, “Hills Like White Elephants”


  33. Renee Espriu
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 19:01:25

    It’s always us in the beginning and the when it’s three!….well, three is a crowd, don’t ya know. LOL :)


  34. Mary
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 19:05:04

    Funny how perspectives change, isn’t it?


  35. Teresa
    Feb 06, 2013 @ 19:39:08

    Sharp and to the point! This is certainly a relevant topic–always.


  36. aka_andrea
    Feb 07, 2013 @ 09:53:43

    So simple yet so sharp and pointed. Great job!


Don't hold back. Tell me how you really feel! Comment moderation is now OFF!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 889 other followers

%d bloggers like this: