Lucky Girl Child
Our second sister,
birthed still as stone
Never to serve as
our father’s very own
little plaything – then relive,
after years of self-doubt,
what evils her Daddy
had carried about
I think it lucky
she heard God’s sweet call
Was she not graced
by good fate after all?
© 2013 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
As always, I speak on behalf of myself, not for anyone in my family. This is my truth, and I tell it willingly to help others.
As frequent readers here at Sharp Li’l know, I was sexually molested by my father. Long before I was born, my mother suffered a stillbirth during her second pregnancy. Fortunately for Charlotte, subsequent pregnancies went well; however, there were consequences regarding my father – which she finally acknowledged knowing about, during the last year of her life.
Sexual molestation is more frequent in families that most would acknowledge. Fathers, uncles, teachers, and friends of the family, of whom over 90% identify as straight men, are the most frequent perpetrators of pedophilia. If you know a little girl or boy who is easily startled, wets the bed past the usual age, seems unusually shy (or gravitates toward adult figures with inappropriate affection), or even tries to tell you about “bad touches,” please take notice. It may be nothing… or it may be everything for that child to be noticed and taken seriously.
For more information on the signs of child sexual abuse, click HERE.
This was written in response to the weekly Trifecta prompt, Lucky, with 33-333 words, including the third definition below.
LUCKY (adjective)
1: having good luck
2: happening by chance : fortuitous
3: producing or resulting in good by chance: favorable>
May the children near you, and all children worldwide, be freed of this tragic circumstance. Until then, I bid you peace. Amy
Sharp Little Pencil 
McGuffy Ann
I understand, I identify, I feel your pain. Literally.
Lance
again, thank you for sharing your painful past. But “i think it lucky she heard God’s sweet call” is terrific. Very strong piece, amy.
Josie Two Shoes
I wish that I could find reason to disagree, to feel that she wasn’t lucky to never take a breath, but in reality I have to agree, she was blessed that she never had to endure what you did, that she was allowed to remain innocent and free of the touch of evil. Someday you shall meet up, in a place where both of you are finally free!
Sharp Little Pencil
I debated whether to post this, but the comments show that it was the right thing to do. Thanks, Josie.
kimnelsonwrites
You do great service, Amy, letting readers know where and how to find some help if they encounter the monster lurking in the family tree. Well done.
Sharp Little Pencil
Thanks, Kim. I know my process notes are usually longer than the poems, but that’s the activist in me. And sometime I’ll include a picture of me, hiding my eyes from the flashbulbs….
theroadfromhawaii
flipping from my blog to yours, so no need to reply. Your poem was quite moving. It is so true that a lot of misery could be prevented. I am so sorry anyone has to experience sex abuse as a child. http://annbennett2.blogspot.com
Queen of the Tambourine
I haven’t followed your blog closely, but when I’ve stopped by I’ve enjoyed your writing. Thank you for sharing your past, it’s very brave of you. This little poem is haunting, somehow hopeful in it’s hopelessness. Thank you for sharing.
Sharp Little Pencil
Hey Queen, just went to your site and posted comments there. THanks for your sympathetic reply. Peace, Amy
Roger Green
Yow. You are mighty and honest and brave, as usual.
Sharp Little Pencil
Bless you, Rog.
brian miller
i read this earlier but could not comment, not yet…i needed to sit with it…i am actually my parents second baby if you will, my older brother died at birth…i bear his name, so that was enough…but also the abuse and that maybe she was spared that…it should not happen you know…moved me amy
Sharp Little Pencil
Brian, some of my posts bring up bad memories for people. Thank you for working through that pain and reading again. I wasn’t sure I would post this, but I had to, you know?
Sini
That was very brave of you to be able to speak about it. I also share a huge concern for all those children who are abused in a lot of different ways. It saddens me that they run about playing, carrying huge burdens which are not theirs.
Debbie
Thank you, Amy, for the help you give to us, that we may help others.
Sherry Blue Sky
As always, Amy, you speak the truth. Thanks for also adding resources for people to find more information. You are such a strong advocate for children, which is so admirable.
The Real Cie
Very intense. Child abuse carries with it such severe consequences. I was fortunate that my parents were never sexually abusive and weren’t physically abusive (I don’t consider an occasional spanking to be on par with beatings.) They were inadvertently psychologically abusive at times.
I don’t have a WordPress blog. I’m kind of the “organizer” on the Undead in the Netherworld blog. We always enjoy your comments!
ramblingsfromamum
I hesitated hitting the like button for I do not obviously like the thread of this sad and very tragic tale, but I hit it in the end for your courage and your commitment to help others. Thank you for writing.
Euan
Thank you so much for visiting my post – I usually like to be the first to visit. I was going to smile at the memory I always had of Pepine and his intimidating size, even after all these years, but am numbed by our post. Completely, at the fact,and the iron sardonic ‘luckiness.’ I am a father of 3 girls. Do you know, if a post starts about a child I usually just stop reading and move on because I feel that also is not ok, because the child might not have agreed to their photo being displayed, or is too young etc. To imagine and know of ‘sexual’ abuse is painful. I know it is also prevalent in India, a country I like very much normally, and goodness knows about other countries.
So your poem was just so stunning, but the topic itself heartbreaking. I do not want to go on about the perpetrators. They are beyond words. They know what the are doing, from each priest to each family member. It makes me physically sick to even think about it, and even now, society generally ignores this, until it happens, then it is shock horror again.
My last word..in this already too long comment. When I was 25, I met a beautiful woman I fell in love with. One night she told me how much her father had sexually abused her. My anger, pain for her was so strong I took a bat and went to her house. I did break the front door window. But I stopped. It was just so sick having to answer his pathetic indignation. I never reported him. Maybe it did not cross my mind, just don’t know. I hate that I never reported him, years later. I was in a country I hated, where the police were vile to foreigners -Switzerland, at that time, but there was no excuse not to have him dragged publicly to court and jail. Makes me sad. Anyway. Sorry, and very good post.
Sabio Lantz
Gutsy move to share like this — or maybe you are a sharing person by nature, but this sort of sharing is incredibly helpful to so many folks. Thank you.
You will help me keep my attention to see this in children and per chance to help someone in the future. Nicely written.
El Guapo
Even without knowing any of your story, this hits with a punch.
Maggie
I very much understand the intent of your thoughts and often wish I had not been born into the hands of the world of pedophilia. Something kept me from having children long before remembering the abuse and still give thanks for that. Thank you for using your story to educate. Or try. So many prefer to believe it doesn’t exist or isn’t so bad. It’s devastating. Bless that sweet little girl who never knew the pain. Hugs.
Lisa A.Williams poetry
So brave of you to share this sadness, written so tenderly about such a tragedy. Thank you for sharing this.
Jennifer Dillon
I agree, the tenderness here is in stunning contrast to the brutality of the Daddy’s evils.
EmmaK
What a tragic and sad poem, indeed the baby was lucky she died before anything bad happened to her. It is wonderful that you are talking about your sexual abuse and helping others to be aware that it might be going on amongst our families.
steph
So brave to tell us your story. Beautiful poem, though tragic to say the least. Sharing your story to help and warn others is a compassionate thing to do. Inspiring, really.
Valerie
I’m so full of admiration for your bravery in bringing up the story of your past. You never know who might really need to see this, and find help, and hope.
I also want to add that I love the name Amy…”beloved.” Not only is my own precious daughter named Amy, but throughout my life I’ve known so many inspiring women with that name:)
Habiba Danyal
The last line of your poem moved me the most. Sad and true.
Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
Very moving.. and so sad that men can do this against any child. Telling it is so brave and your question at the end is so hard to answer.
kymminbarcelona
Sadly sweet. The tenderness for the stillborn, spared sister comes through over the negativity. Kudos.
Brian Benoit
It’s amazing what great work people can do using their worst experiences as raw material — this is a perfect example. Loved the form, the rhythm and the ironic interpretation of lucky.
Draug419
Thank you for sharing your story, as hard as it probably is. Though sad, this piece is very powerful.
jannatwrites
Your poetry is always passionate and stirs emotions – this is no different. This is such a beautiful but sad poem. Those last two lines gave me a shiver. Life is truly miserable when death is seen as good fate. I appreciate your honesty and your willingness to share your experience to help others.
Dana
Wow. WOW. My thoughts are reeling on this powerful yet so beautifully written post, so my only comment is this: {{{HUGS}}}
Old Ollie
Thanks for being so caring, and gutsy! Bless you!
kaykuala
You tell it as it is, Amy! This is not something that can be resolved easily as emotions are involved. It’s important for the right kind of help for them. You’ve so kindly provided the link which is a very good start. Sad episode but you’ve done very well to face it squarely head-on. Nicely Ma’am!
Hank
Tara R.
So powerful, so poignant. Thank you for sharing this painful part of your life.
Christine
Such beautiful words for such an ugly experience.
Lumdog
A lovely poem that tells a horrific story.
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Renee TennisMcKinley (@2old2tap)
Such a heartbreaking piece. But words that need to be seen.
And you’ve expressed them with beauty.
drpkp
Amer – as always authentic, true and sparkling with compassion and love in this case for the sister that you embrace although never came to know. Keep, keeping on. 🙂