THE WAY I’M GOING GREY
Grey
springs up
livens hair
God’s free highlights
upon this crone’s crown
Silver threads, valued so,
weaving their way farther up
from hairline to thatched brown fields
Growing stronger, a widening way
Accentuates mature women’s beauty
Most women bend to social demands
Face the fact, youthfulness attracts
Yet intact my grey stays, quite
stubborn am I, one of
few women I know
who find value
climbing the
shakra
tree
© 2013 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
For Imaginary Garden With Real Toads Open Link Monday, a double etheree about aging and being OK with it. I stopped coloring my hair years before I started my grey streak, which has also peppered my hair. I vowed to never be a “tragically blonde crone.” In a society where women “of a certain age” are not valued for their wisdom and experience, I don’t care if people see me as an old lady. Hey, I earned every grey hair – and that goes for my wrinkles, too! This picture was taken in honor of GLBTQ Pride Day, and our church played Lady Gaga today. Really! Peace, Amy
Sharp Little Pencil 
mcwatty9
cool diamond, nice poem.
Sharp Little Pencil
Thanks McWatty! Glad you stopped by. Now I’m coming over to see your work. Peace, Amy
Susie Clevenger (@wingsobutterfly)
Aging, we can do it with grace or become spoiled children stomping our feet…I love your attitude. My hair has God’s free highlights of snow white in places. There are those who spend hundreds of dollars to get what nature hands to me. I say enjoy each moment and make my children nuts with my antics…lol
Sharp Little Pencil
Susie, you are my kind of gal. I especially appreciate driving your kids nuts… do you sing along with the overhead music in stores, and walk along to the beat? This used to drive Riley CRAZY. She’d walk away and pretend we were not related! Ah, fun. And I earned every grey hair and every wrinkle. I’m proud that people call me “ma’am” instead of “miss” now. And being a wacky wild woman (paging Sherry and Shay) is as good as it gets! Amy
Gemma Wiseman
I’m a part of the grey brigade. Gave up dying the stuff and just let it be. Love this affirmation that being grey is quite an acceptable positive. (But, if truth be known, I have some weak moments when I wish I wasn’t quite so grey. Sighhhhhhhhh)
Sharp Little Pencil
Gemma, be strong, girl. We have to stick together. Just remember, the Crone Army has your back!! A
georgefloreswrite
Amy – I’m all grey and have been for a while now. I know you always think of me as a male, but I’m not and no way am I getting rid of my greys. They are beautiful and so are yours!
Sharp Little Pencil
I think as people age, the tone of their skin (particularly European-descent skin) changes in such a way that coloring it CAN look a bit fake. I know plenty of women who color their hair, and I don’t lose any respect for them. It’s all a choice. But I DO mind when people say, “When are you going to do something about that grey?” Drives me batty, because I would never comment on their dye job!! Thanks, George, AMy
georgefloreswrite
🙂 What drove me batty was looking like Pepe Le Pieux every two weeks. Not good.
vandana
You are beautiful!!!!I think the beauty of greys lie in accepting them. Sooner or later we all be down the grey line, so lets age gracefully.
Sharp Little Pencil
Vandana, I’m right there with you, and thank you for the “beautiful” remark. Let’s say well-preserved for 56! And yes, most of us have to face it, even my hub, who’s getting very grey in his moustache first and just flecks in his black Italian hair. Verrry distinguished! Amy
Karen
It’s all about how you feel inside. Remember how people used to say, “Pretty is as pretty does”? Well, they were right!
Sharp Little Pencil
Wow, Karen, you’re right, it’s all about attitude. Coming to your blog now, Amy
Roger Green
I’ve been balding for so long, and I don’t care. Now gray as well; c’est la vie.
Sharp Little Pencil
I’m kind of glad female baldness doesn’t run in my part of the family… my mom had thinning hair, but that came from overprocessing it, I think.
Bald is the new Don Draper, or didn’t you know? Before I married Lex, some of the sexiest guys I knew were bald or balding. One guy in our congregation, who spoke about growing up gay in the black Baptist church (last Sunday was Madison Pride) is bald, and I tell ya, there are several ladies who’d like him to jump the fence. But he’s happily married to Oscar and they adopted the sweetest baby boy… Amy
brian miller
smiles…embrace it, for sure…my beard has been going grey for 5 years…the salt is starting to win more than the pepper, ha…not sure how much wisdom comes with it but…i def want to age gracefully embracing the flavors of each…i turn 40 in 10 days…guess that means i am a third of the way eh? smiles.
Sharp Little Pencil
Only 40 and you’re so accomplished. As you would say, smiles… Brian, we all have to be who we are, with what we’ve been given. I’m so lucky to have every grey hair on my head. I hear you. Amy
kaykuala
one of
few women I know
who find value
climbing the
shakra
tree
Graying with dignity! That’s how I see it! And it’s a privilege that takes years to accomplish! You did well to reveal it Not many would volunteer to do so! Brilliant take Amelita!
Hank
Sherry Blue Sky
I would love to visit a church that plays Lady Gaga! Cool! I have never colored my hair either, Amy, and figure whatever it is that is happening up top – a mix of red, white and gray (at least it isnt blue!) is as close to blonde as I will ever get!!!!
Sharp Little Pencil
Yeah, I’m getting “blonder” every day, if silver is a shade of blonde. And I DO have more fun than when I was fully brunette, because I started going grey when I met Lex! A
Susan
I LOVE the picture! And prize the grey, too. This poem has the proud and glorious footstep of the aging “Cone’s Crown.” I do not personally know the Shakra Tree, but by the evidence of this great poem, it knows me. Bravo!
Sharp Little Pencil
Susan… it knows you, ha ha ha. Hey, in any language, it’s all about embracing change… and change of life. Oy vey! A
Irene Golembo
Bold!Sharp with humor! 🙂
Sharp Little Pencil
Irene, I believe this is your first comment, so welcome! Thanks for commenting and I’m heading over to your blog now! Peace, Amy
Queenie
That’s a smart answer to a tricky qusetion
Timoteo
You are the embodiment of the Aretha Franklin song, “Natural Woman.”
Sharp Little Pencil
Wow, even being in the same phrase as Aretha is an honor. Thanks so much!! A
Kerry O'Connor
I admire the freedom there is on going grey – I’m not quite there yet and give in to vanity to keep my roots well-hidden. But one day…
Sharp Little Pencil
No criticism here, babe. It’s up to each one of us what we do with our bodies… and yeah, tell THAT to some states’ governors, huh? A
Mama Zen
I think you look fabulous! I’m embracing my gray, too.
Sharp Little Pencil
Hey, just keepin’ it real, right? I love this change. Amy
Hannah Gosselin
Awesome! I will be doing the same and I’m proud of you. YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL!! xoxo
Sharp Little Pencil
Thanks, my dear. Hope you are able to hold on and go for it! Sherry and I and several others will support you… including Brian, ha ha.
Lisa A.Williams
So much better to accept those grays, I haven’t given in yet but no doubt it will be soon. Very nice!
Sharp Little Pencil
Lisa, take it as it comes. You’ll know when you’re ready. My advantage is having short hair, because it came in fast. Longer hair, well, grey can have a mind all its own…!
I HAVE A VOICE
Charming ! Loved eVery word! Clever!
Ella
Bravo Amy! Bold and fabulous~ What your church played Lady Gaga-I want to go there~ So many great lines: I love “God’s free highlights” beautiful!!!
Sharp Little Pencil
Thanks for comments on both, Ella! Anytime you find yourself in Madison, WI, you have a church… and a guest room!! And the grey, I’m so happy people are pleased with this one. Coming to see you now. Amy
Kay, Alberta, Canada
What a super poem, Amy, and congratulations on refusing to color your hair. I started going grey before my mother did, a trait inherited from my dad’s side of the family. I played with it for a while…dyeing the grey bits purple and wearing only purple clothes. That was fun. But it’s almost all grey now and staying that way. Mom still wasn’t completely grey when she died at 83.
K
Sharp Little Pencil
Kay, interesting about how you greyed. My mom had what she called “bad grey,” a bit yellow. I am lucky- got Grandpa and Grandma’s hair (her parents), silver as all get-out. I do use a shampoo with that purple stuff in it once a week to keep it shiny.
My girlfriend Kim is prematurely grey, and she just did a purple highlight thing with her hair, too! How fun – I’ll have to tell her she has a soul sister in Canada! Amy
Margaret
…and YOU look wonderful peppered. I’m “blond” buy hopefully not tragically yet 🙂 I know one thing, it is really hard to stop coloring as the best way to go grey is to just let it pepper in naturally.
Sharp Little Pencil
You, my dear, are NOT tragically blonde. One of my sisters still clings to bleachy bleachy blonde, and she looks like a Power Puff Girl. THAT is “tragically blonde”!! Amy
Patricia A. McGoldrick
I like your take on going grey, Amy! I’m finding that grey adds a whole new texture as it appears, a character of its own. Yeah grey!
Sharp Little Pencil
It really is a whole different texture and has a unique way of sprouting out. I have to keep mine short, lest it go all corkscrewy on me. And I’m screwy enough! LOL
oldegg
Hair is the least of my troubles. Back, knees, teeth, are all rebelling at our long association. Yes, the hair is grey so what? My main gripe is why the need to grow hair in the ears now, what possible use is that?
Sharp Little Pencil
It’s to filter out rude people’s comments! Amy
Madeleine Begun Kane
Lovely poem. And I agree with you about grey hair. I started going grey in my twenties and I actually like it. 🙂
Sharp Little Pencil
You wear it so well, Madeleine, and I figured you were prematurely grey. You’re lucky to be able to wear it long, too… I tried to grow mine out but it went all “sproingy” on me, so I cut it back!
Cynthia
I love your poetry, especially this one (so far — I’ve just begun to read).! I made my way to your blog from your comment in Our WorldTuesday and I’m glad to find you.
Sharp Little Pencil
Welcome, Cynthia. Thanks for taking time to comment. If you have a blog, I’m coming over to see you as well. Peace, Amy
Laurie Kazmierczak
Love your form and prose….I went grey (Hah, white!) early….sales people would ask my youngest daughter how she liked shopping with her grandmother! when we shopped. But I didn’t care. Moses had to see the face of God to get his glorious silver hair and I came by it naturally♫♪
Sharp Little Pencil
When I was little and saw “The Ten Commandments,” I told my mother God was mean because “he scared Moses so bad, his hair turned grey all of a sudden.” My mother told that story ’til the day she died. Thanks for the memory, and congrats on being “greyceful!”
Mary
Ha, will I enjoy highlighting my hair but only once a year. 1/3 blonde / 1/3 red / and 1/3 natural………and it all just blends together. I think whatever works for a person is fine. Smiles.
Sharp Little Pencil
I’m with you, Mary. I have a friend who’s half grey and half purple! She just decided she needed more color in her life! I say, whatever makes you feel your best, go for it. You’re lucky on that blend, by the way. My sister is a home-dye blonde (the one I refer to as “tragically blonde,” it looks so fake!). Amy
Sara v
Amy, you are such a fabulous role model–wish that I was ready for going gray–tired of the dye, but at the same time can’t really go gray–my mother-in-law is 89 and still dyes her hair! Vanity is hilarious. 🙂
Sharp Little Pencil
Hey, my mom had that “golden grey,” and she colored it all the time. In fact, just before she went into a coma during her last hospitalization, she said, and this is the God’s honest truth, “I’m glad I had someone come over and color my hair before I got sick.” I think she knew this was the last we would see of her, and she wanted to look her best. Oh. My. God. She was a hoot. Thanks for bringing up the memory.
It’s not vanity if is helps your self-esteem – it’s self-care! Amy