TO ALL MY WONDERFUL READERS: If you are uncomfortable with the growing phenomenon of “cutting” among young women, please skip this – or scroll down and learn. There’s a new, hopeful trend among teens and 20s of tattooing the word “Love” on one’s inside wrist as a reminder, either for themselves to not cut, or in solidarity with and compassion for those who do. Peace, Amy
Bleed
Awesome with a razor
She’s straight-edge all the way
Cuts in patterns
Endangering her health
for the sake of
force-feeding her psyche
She sees no hazard
in this habitual ritual
She knows what she’s doing
She gets in lots of practice
She’s waited all day to
be alone with the one…
The blade that understands
her pain and her release
The pain she cannot name
and isn’t ready to claim
Today, perfect lines, sleek
and hardly bleeding at all
Tomorrow, she’ll wear
a long-sleeved hoodie
in the torrid noonday sun
© 2012 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
For ABC Wednesday (B) and for Three Word Wednesday: Cut, Endanger, Hazard.
Girls who are numb to the world because of depression or other mental disorders, may cut themselves in order to feel. The warning signs are long-sleeved shirts in the hottest weather, parents finding an Exacto knife or other sharp instrument under her bed… just know they are in need of help, not irredeemable nor incurable. They are hurting themselves because they were hurt, and getting down to the problem starts with counseling. Peace, Amy
Sharp Little Pencil 
hypercryptical
Maybe I am misunderstanding you here Amy as I didn’t know that some young women now cut themselves intentionally to ‘tattoo’ only that cutting was ‘self-medication’ for some who are depressed.
You have inspired me to write about this and this will be a future post, for now work in progress.
Anna :o]
PS My latest poetic rendition can be found here http://hypercryptical.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/the-old-asylum.html
Sharp Little Pencil
Hyper, the Tattoo was metaphorical. Sorry for the misunderstanding. Amy
Vaishali Jain
Amy, this is a beautiful and thought-provoking write. They, indeed, need help. None should be so much in misery that they have to hurt themselves to feel something. I had written a poem long back but then I didnt know that this actually happens. Wish there were more love and hope around. Sigh!
Thank you!
Sharp Little Pencil
There is SO much love and hope, but some folks don’t have the self-esteem to believe they deserve it. Sometimes it’s a childhood trauma, sometimes a dysfunctional family… sometimes it just IS. But therapy helps. Peace, AMy
Jae Rose
Gentle..intelligent..peaceful young men and women..who would never hurt anybody else..that for me is the key..i am glad you give voice..because those long sleeves in the summer do not get any more comfortable with age..jae x
Sharp Little Pencil
Well said, Jae. It was 100 degrees in Madison and the long sleeves on some almost served as a lighthouse, you know? So sad. Love, Amy
oldegg
Although not unknown it seems to many quite an alien thing to do to oneself. Perhaps it is a way of shutting out a deeper pain, abuse, neglect or even lack of self worth. The more it is done the less attention is needed on the real problem which has been unrecognized by others. What a excellent post Amy, to alert us of this growing problem.
Sharp Little Pencil
Bless you, Robin. My blog exists to shine that light. Love, Amy
Roger Green
I hear also that piercing (such as with staples – yuck) are increasingly popular. I wish I could understand the mindset better.
Oh, and I wear long-sleeved shirts because of my vitiligo, for the record.
ROG, ABC Wednesday team
Sharp Little Pencil
Roger, I wish my father had eschewed shorts to hide his varicose veins, which resembled the Amazon!
Happy/sad to be educating people about this, and I’ve known several cutters and we have spoken at length. It’s actually about feeling SOMETHING because of an inner emptiness… Amy
Meryl
I give you credit for tackling such an important issue – as unpleasant as it is for me and so many of us, and you do it with passion.
Sharp Little Pencil
Bless you, Meryl. A
Paula Scott: Molokai Girl Studio
In high school, I knew a younger student who did something quite like this-although she wasn’t using a razor at that time-but her nails. I saw it, talked to her about it. Asked her permission to hook her up with the school counselor. Talked to the school counselor. Got them together and parents became aware of how their treatment of her affected her. At that point in time, it ended up good-but I always wondered if it was enough to last a lifetime.
You are so right-this is something folks don’t talk about-like child molestation. Makes people really uncomfortable.
Carver
Very poignant post about a difficult issue. I liked the poem. Sometimes tackling hard topics seems to work better through poetry and you did a great job with it. Carver, ABC Wed. Team
Sharp Little Pencil
I’ve found that to be true. I certainly would not want to try writing a song about it, but I’m sure the post-grunge movement has something out there, perhaps a feminist artist…
Sarav
Amy, you have such a way with words–razor sharp point, well taken. Very sad, thank you for leaving the good message at the end–not hopeless, just needing a helpful hand or ear.
Christopher
Amy, you are doing your work. I trust you will find a continuing path.
Lindy Lee
This cutting crushes one’s soul. No young person should have to feel this way. You write it necessarily, instructively. Thank you, my kind WordPress friend…
El Guapo
Again, you take a difficult topic and phrase it in a way that both grabs and will stay with me.
Anders Woje Ellingsen
You state that she does so “for the sake of force-feeding her psyche”. This, I believe, is the door to understanding. I also believe no virgin will cut herself. And I believe this habit would be abandoned if the girl had a real man to relate to, a man who could really aim her. The lack of moral is the problem.
I see you are very free regarding form. I encourage you to consider form. If, for example, there were the same number of stressed syllables in each line in your poem it would be easier to read, a bigger challenge to make, and it would be more special. (｡◕‿◕｡)
▌▲ AWE ▲▐
Sharp Little Pencil
Anders, I appreciate your leaving such a comprehensive comment. I do have some experience with the young women involved in this phenomenon, and let me clear up a couple of details:
I’m glad you said “I believe” in your statement that no virgin would cut herself, since that means you are owning your opinion. I also know that faith is important to both of us, and plenty of my readers, our mutual friends.
Fact is, it’s often “virgins” (translated from the Greek, the Biblical term “virgin’ is actually “young, unmarried woman) who cut themselves. And having “a real man” (not sure what you mean; my father was a “real man” and he molested his daughters, so, you know what I mean?) in her life doesn’t help. I know plenty of girls who cut who come from totally functional families (I know the signs to look for, believe me). Girls who cut do not lack morals. They lack self-esteem, and only a good therapist has a chance of helping them.
Thanks also for the mention of form. Funny, I intentionally didn’t use form because the idea of putting something this tragic, this raw, into iambic pentameter sort of “pretties it up”: I want the ‘unsettledness’ to reign. I always appreciate creative critique, so I wanted to explain why I don’t normally use form. Might be an easier read, but this isn’t supposed to read easily. I know I’m on track when the reader is shaken after reading, or if they are moved to action.
Bless you, Anders, for speaking your truth on my blog. I’m honored. Peace, Amy
oncealibrarian
I’ll simply say – what a wonderful reply.
lucychili
yes.
hollyannegetspoetic
It’s not an easy issue to tackle, but I respect you for doing so with straight talking and sensitivity.
gabriella8
Thanks for taking this on with such compassion
Young girls, unformed and brimming with swirling emotion. what culturally acceptable outlet? where the inspirations for healthy coping strategies?
gabriella8
Thanks for taking this on with such compassion. So many react reflexively with revulsion.
Pain is pain. We don’t condemn the licit comfort of alcohol or brief consolation of casual sex.
Young girls, mostly, unformed and swirling with emotion. What culturally acceptable outlet is there for them? Where can they find inspiration for healthy strategies to cope?
You offer some hope and consolation.
Sharp Little Pencil
I wish there were more resources for support groups or simply talking-it-out groups in schools. There are groups for LGBT teens in some schools, some have groups for Christian students – why not a girls’ “who am I and what am I doing here?” open discussion group? Thanks, Gabrielle.
kaykuala
Amy,
I’ve no idea it can come to this. Innocent little girls cutting and risking themselves in such circumstances would only hurt themselves. It’s just a fad but it would leave emotional and physical scarring. It’s a strange phenomena! Thanks for sharing, Ma’am!
Sharp Little Pencil
It’s worse than a fad. It’s like eating disorders – somewhere in that “misfit toys” land between mental disorders and addictions. I’m coming to see you now, Hank. Peace, A.
brian miller
fairly certain i commented earlier this week, so its probably waiting to be approved…all too real…and always great to see you at OLN>….smiles.
henryclemmons
I love the double edged sword of the presentation. Pain releasing joy, the search for joy through pain. The tattooing of one self for identity and solidarity at the same. Very smart write. excellente presentation.
Steve E
Hi Amy. You fearlessly approach this topic. I didn’t know about the wrist/love relationship. It is good…maybe. Why oh why is this all necessary? BTW, I asked that same question in 1945…when girls were ‘doing it’ (actually, ‘doing’ LOTS of things.)
It seems each generation believes the trends of “depravity”–grin! are growing. Well, the number of PEEPS is growing!
Also, what was kept under wraps–behind closed doors–way back then, has come out into the open more and more. You approach this topic with empathy which is positive. Thank you.
I haven’t been here for awhile…no reason. Or maybe you posted something political, which went against all my own beliefs, don’t remember. (I’ve ceased fighting anything and eveything–even alcohol–grin!)
I DO know that I hate all the wasted time/hoops which Word Press puts me through, just because I’m not a ‘member’. I HATE filling our EVERY F’King time who I am, etc. But that’s not YOUR problem, it is mine alone.
Glad to ‘see’ you again.
PEACE!
Steve E
Sharp Little Pencil
Steve, if I post something political that is against your beliefs, feel free to call me on it. We can always do an email exchange of ideas. I believe in mutual respect in discourse one on one, but calling out groups whose ideas inflict hurt on others. Hmmm… wonder what I did or wrote? Probably one of my rants about Sarah Palin or something? (wink) Love, Amy
Gay Reiser Cannon
This is not news to me – but it saddens me. Rather than an “up with women” attitude that my age group had at that age, this one seems burdened with isolation, insecurities, and low self esteem. Some say computers are adding to the problem..that social media on computers or cell phones don’t compensate for the need to have physical interaction with friends, and peers. I wonder if it’s worse if home schooling or college by computer is in play? Well written poem!
Laurie Kolp
Very effective just the way it is, Amy. It saddens me that so many do this. It is a cry for help.
wolfsrosebud
worked with a girl in spring who was a cutter… in group time I told each girl they where beautiful, after listening to a song by a christian singing group whose chorus focused on each of us being beautiful… i cried later when i talked with her and she announced that night she wrote on her wrist that she was beautiful… for one night she made the better choice
The Course of Our Seasons
heartbreaking – trying to control the seemingly uncontrollable – I appreciate your fearless voice in this poem and in your thoughtful comments. K
rmp
I don’t know how I missed this for 3WW; oddly enough, the same sickness came to mind when I saw the three words. I’m glad you chose to share this at the pub.
a very beautiful and chilling write.
Annette Mickelson
I am surprised by the number of young girls my daughter knows who cut themselves — some guys too. such a strange, disturbing practice. Thanks for writing about it.
Daydreamertoo
When she was 12, Chloe began to do this. First I knew of it was, she wanted to wear a piece of rag on one hand. I told her it looked ridiculous but she said it was EMO. She wanted to be EMO. I asked what the heck EMO was and she said she didn’t know, just some of the girls at school were EMO. I looked it up online and told her EMO stands for emotionally disturbed. By then (I didn’t know it) but she’d started to scratch her arms with the points of a comb. When I saw her arms all superficially scratched when she was wearing a T shirt, I asked her if she was unhappy, and she said ‘No’ I told her if she does it again, I would need to take her to see a doctor and she may need therapy if she thinks herself as being so emotionally disturbed that she feels a need to start self harming. Thankfully Amy, she saw what I was trying to say and, she stopped wanting to be EMO to ‘fit in’ with the crowd. Scary being a parent, isn’t it. Very good subject to write about and bring into the open Amy. Well said.
Steve King
Amy, Very powerful (and sad) rendering of this phenomenon. I’d never really understood this, nor heard much of it. The way you’ve presented it works for me.
tigerbrite
Well done, Amy.
Susan
In the HS poetry club I ran before retirement, twice girls shared poems about cutting and, to protect myself from the law, I had to give their work and names to counselors. One was labeled ok and writing about friends; one was sent to shrink, home, institution. She came back in two months to thank me, but I still felt troubled–as do friends of cutters, not knowing what to do. So, long story short, your poem is important in content and in tone. Thank you for writing it.
Leo
I can’t imagine how “cutting” would help in any way… Scary, just the thought of it.
Leo
Renee Espriu
I have a good friend who use to ‘cut’ and yes, to be able to feel pain…not physical…but in a way she could not. A blessed and wonderful person and I could never walk in her shoes but then again I’m sure she would not want me to. Something to put out there that so few talk about, Amy, and it is good that you do.