Bitter Silence
Five years old, small for her age
Dreads night’s flannel silence
She’s scared of flashbulbs and
cannot swallow medicine
“Let it float, like a boat,” says mother
Finally, the girl manages to
chew bitter aspirin and swallow
Her nightgown, often wet at dawn
Fragile, frail, third of three girls
Until age forty, she was able to forget
the reason for vague, haunting fears:
She was Daddy’s favorite pet
© 2012 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Sunday Scribblings wanted poems about silence. There is peaceful silence; then, there is the conspiracy of silence which burdens small children with undue shame and guilt.
This is reworked from an earlier poem, “Bitter Fruits.” I’m amazed at how looking back at old work, seen with fresh eyes, is able to morph into something better. This is me, my childhood, and I’m glad that therapy and psychiatry have helped me overcome many obstacles that had me stuck in that “zany girl/catatonic girl” hell. I’m still fun, but I’m in control of my mood much more now!
Sharp Little Pencil 
ihatepoetry
Much love my little friend with the big heart and mind! Very thankful for you – love, Mosk
brian miller
ugh…turns my stomach…i am glad you are a survivor…i am sorry you had to live it…and i am proud of you that you can write on it…
vivinfrance
Amen.
Penny
Your work never fails to stun me Amy. Its so good, it hurts. Penny
Lafemmeroar
Beautifully written! Not obvious but the message is there! Ugh … the last line is haunting …
Roger Green
as usual, powerful. and painful. you’re a gutsy woman, Amy.
Sherry Blue Sky
You are a warrior woman, my friend. Proud of you!
Debbie
You are amazing Amy. Praying your poem helps others that are trapped in that silence. So thankful for you!
Mama Pajama
wonderful and awful and scary and confusing and NOT okay…such strength and character. so glad you made it through. we need you. thank you.
oldegg
Your voice is proud and strong and feisty but nothing will return the lost years to you and no balm soothe the pain. No one should keep silent.
vivinfrance
For all you have overcome, bravo for your fighting spirit. Re-visiting old work is a good idea – frequently something good emerges from the new view.
Jae Rose
Love to you Amy..never stop talking..writing..being you x
kalicet
that’s so painful. Well written, brave to say, and an honour to read.
Lance
I’ve read this four times and the thump in my chest grows more pronounced each time. This is gorgeous and powerful.
josie2shoes
I can’t help but think that maybe because you had to suffer in silence, and are now willing and able to speak out, another will find the courage to tell their story, and anotyher, and another. Blessings to you, and hugs to that amazing little girl who somehow found the strength to survive!
tigerbrite
Love and blessings Amy.
dani
i’m glad things are better for you now, Amy! hard to get rid of those scars.
*hugs*
♥
Marsha
You’re right about revisiting previous work because new richness can spring forth. I’m so sorry you didn’t have a sweet childhood. Not many of us did. From which pain springs forth the beauty.
Belva@MainelyMugUps
I’m sending love and prayers your way. You are brave to discuss it, but you’re right some silence is not good or healthy.
SaraV
Well done Amy. Hearty-breaking, gut-kicking good. Excellent reworking, kind of a metaphor-you just keep getting better 🙂
Renee Espriu
That you now speak out and are not afraid to do so can give so many others hope that their voices will be heard as well. I will always be glad I ran across your site. Thank You!