THE DRINKING YEARS
The drinking years poured on
in various degrees of fizzfriction
My dream manifested: 18 at last
My tribute, a friend bought
the first round and round we went
Soon, my lonely heart found itself
nestled in the arms of some shlump
I met the night before… score
I had envisioned losing IT
over Chateauneuf du Pape
Not snotlockered over boilermakers
Finally I was a space cadet in
launch mode: “If I am to…
stay here for a… p-period of time,
will someone pleeeeeease
persuade the floor to pleeeeease…
stop spinning?”
© 2013 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
The Sunday Whirl gave us a Baker’s Dozen of words. Click the link to see what others have done with this unique prompt, and, as always, thanks to Brenda Warren for her sharing the list!
This is also “in the margins” at Imaginary Garden With Real Toads and Poets United.
Suffice it to say, after watching my mother die from a combination of 50 years of smoking and 40 of drinking (she was in recovery toward the end), I gave up partying. Besides, I’d much rather enjoy the occasional microbrew beer than depend on Gordon’s for a lifeline. Thanks, Mama, for showing me the better path. Peace, Amy
ABC Wednesday, brought to you by the letter, “Z”! (Do we start on the Cyrillic alphabet now?) Also at the poetic collective, Poets United.
This poem is based on the phenomenon that effectively destroyed my piano-bar career… Amy
Zithromax (Think Before Lighting Up Indoors)
A smoky club, the trapped wait staff
take your orders and get the shaft.
While you puff a cig or two,
others do just as you do.
You can leave and breathe fresh air;
singers, barkeeps, stuck in there
Low-wage job with no insurance;
Z-pac samples help endurance.
When you blithely light that match
think of what the workers catch.
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
First, SORRY if I have not responded to your comments these past few days. Our daughter is visiting and that’s a lot of giggling, soul-searching, cafe and/or bar time out of my day!! I promise to catch up soon, so please know, if you’re offended, hey – so is everyone else!
Therefore, I offer/proffer a TWOFER! First for Poetic Asides (“don’t start that again”); the other, for ABC Wednesday (brought to you by the letter “U”). And, of course, at Poets United, my heart. Love and peace, Amy
First, Poetic Asides:
Don’t Start Doing That Again
Think first.
Remember.
Exhalations to renovate reality.
Perforations to perceive perfection.
Condemnations from family, friends.
Intimidations from drug dealers
Remember.
Think first.
It ain’t worth it.
Run.
Fast, baby,
run as fast as you can
to your NA meeting.
© 2011 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
PS to all: Thank God I never succumbed to the needle. It would have been the end of me, for sure.
___________________________________________________________
Second: The letter “U”, ABC Wednesday
Ugly Duckling
Under mirror scrutiny,
every flaw uncovered.
Ubiquitous plague of teens
(zits), seem unique to her.
Up and down university steps,
unaware how her ass undulates
as underclassmen (and women)
ache to uncover what lies beneath.
Unable to see her utmost beauty:
Her undercover laugh, her catlike grin,
her undeniable, ironic humor.
Now, an ugly duckling…
Ultimately, she will become a swan.
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
For NaPoWriMo, I took up the Poetic Asides prompt, “Don’t ____ _____,” in which we are to fill in the blanks. So many well-intentioned folks unwittingly forward viruses by forwarding messages. My pet peeve is chain letters: They often come with the assurance that “God wants us to live abundantly,” (as though God’s abundance has anything thing to do with filthy lucre) and then tell you that you MUST forward to 128 people in the next 3 seconds and your ‘money wish’ will come true. Yeah, God’s all about the money, guys. That’s why Jesus lived in a diamond-encrusted palace! Amy
Don’t Forward Emails
Please
I’m begging you
No more kitten and kitten and cute kitten and cuter kitten pix
No more e-cards with prancing bears
For the love of God
No more Rick Warren quotes
No more assurances of God’s love (as if I don’t know that already)
No more “Obama is Muslim” warnings
For the sake of my sanity
No more chain letters threatening an outbreak
of bubonic plague if I don’t forward it to 12 friends
No more Chicken Soup
Please
I’m on my knees
When next you a forward a forward
Skip me. There, I’ve implored.
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
ABC Wednesday, brought to you by the letter “L.” I could have declare my last posting, a limerick, as my “L,” but today they are counting votes in Wisconsin and I haven’t gotten in trouble for voicing my polarizing views on political morality (oxymoron, I know) in almost a week. So get ready, here it comes, from the cranky menopausal mom…! Amy
Loud, Lecherous Legislators
Family Values legislators jump through hoops
to prove they love Jesus, America, and “traditional marriage”
(not necessarily in that order)
Problem is, their hero is Newt Gingrich
who has been married three times
who left his first wife while she was in cancer treatment
who the Bible says is a fornicator, since he re-married
with this ex-wife still alive.
(Maybe Mitt gets a pass on his three marriages because he’s Mormon?
Except they don’t condone divorce, so is he really Mormon now?
Lord, this gets confusing, using the Bible as a salad bar.)
Family Values should be about loving families
but for these louts, the family must be straight
and have two parents of opposite gender
and produce children (so infertile people must not count)
and not rely on any public assistance
(even as their corporate masters take massive tax breaks,
sucking on the public teat like it’s a Dairy Queen)
Family Values lackeys are also homophobes
The louder they scream how they don’t believe
in “Adam and Steve,” the more often
get caught on the Down Low, their lover
ensconced in a cozy nest (charged to taxpayers)
or sliding a loafer under the men’s room stall
“It slipped.” (No, you slipped, sir)
Lest I be taken as a “lying Liberal,” I admit:
The Left does it too, in spades
We know most of them screw around
I mean, look at Bill Clinton
The difference is, they live and let live
They don’t tell us how to pursue love
or where, or when, or how many times
or with whom
So when you hear from “Family Values” candidates, remember
their values are flawed and loose
and their families often vamoose
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
For my third day of National Poetry Writing Month, I decided to follow a prompt, because it called out to me. Sunday Scribblings asked for poems about messengers. This is for my mother, who beat the devil and was sober the final 10 years of her life. She’s been gone 21 years now, but when I need her, just like Blanche (her mom), she is there for me. In her weakness and in her strength, so many lessons. Miss you, Mama. Love, Amer
Message in a Bottle
For the first time in years
(and so welcome, this occasion)
seated across the kitchen table with Mom.
For the first time in years
(since I had headed west for a spell)
she was not drunk – not even tipsy.
There was a message in
the absence of a gin bottle on that table…
Gordon’s had been her steadfast companion
Now we sat and looked each other in the eye
“Amy,” she said kindly, “there’s a scratch in your voice.
You need to stop smoking pot.”
For the first time in years,
we spoke singer to singer, our voices had always been
our beauty, our careers, our all.
“I sobered up,” she said slowly, “cold turkey.”
It was true – too ashamed to go to a clinic,
knowing so many people in town.
Dad had gone to her door several times each day,
listening to the retching, passing in black coffee
and soda crackers for a solid two weeks.
But for me, quitting a joint a day was easy.
And so the message was clear: No more bottle for her,
no more buds in Buglers for me. Saved my life, she did.
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
A last gasp for Three Word Wednesday, here at my computer on Monday morning! This is an “Amy: The Lost Years” SoCal poem. Remember… and learn. Amy
Mellow Times (3WW: Mellow, Breeze, Tickle)
Mellow times, man, those days
that stretched into nights into
breakfast served up by Ruby.
Stoned to a stupor, we’d loop-de-loop our way
into that café at daybreak. The breeze held
a lingering languor of cannibestest ever.
It tickled my throat, but instead of a cough,
it coaxed from me a bawdy chorus of
“Gimme A Pigfoot and a Bottle of Beer,”
right there on Brooks Court as we
sidewindedly search for that java and huevos rancheros.
Hash brown mornings, hash pipe nights.
© 2011 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Home, sweet home, Madison, WI and Lake Edge UCC. What a lovely reception for us both – you’d think I’d have a more uplifting poem today, but I felt compelled to put this entry in.
This is a cautionary tale… any teen who thinks Pharming is cool and that shoving substances up their nose is fun should think twice. I know; I’ve been there, and this entry is, sad to say, all too true, from many years ago when I was incredibly stupid (and, of course, immortal – weren’t we all?). Parents, talk to you kids. Cop to what you did and let your kids know what’s out there is King Kong compared to the spider monkey shit we did.
NIGHT SHIFT AT TONY’S
Silence of the grave.
The dissipated, pasty-faced coke dealer in his lair: A
hermetically sealed apartment.
No light, save lamps; no breeze, stale air.
No windows open, lest the cool breeze
of Venice Beach disturb piles of priceless product.
It’s all about balance, really.
Delicately spooning precious powder
from bag to scale, wordlessly persevering
during each transaction. Accuracy rules.
Tony’s in the zone.
His place stinks vaguely of chemicals and
days-old takeout – plus a trace of evil.
I mule for the whole crew back at work.
He accepts the cash, hands over the stash.
I smile; he grits his teeth and says take the back stairs.
Tucking the baggie in my bra, I make my way back to work
behind closed doors. Tamp the coke onto the mirror,
razor it into proper sections; every granule counts.
I obsessive-compulsively trustworthy,
entrusted to split the parcels.
Why do I make the run? Because I’m so disgustingly honest.
I fill, never spill, never nick off the till,
and emerge with portions of potion for
my anxious co-conspirators.
We scatter like roaches for hidden dark corners and
restroom stalls, emerge smiling,
frozen-gummed and destined to perform at peak
for at least an hour.
Once Tony cut the stash with laxative and we all
spent our high on the toilet, but we still went back for more.
We paid good money for this slavery and couldn’t make our way past it.
Not in those days, the blinding midnight sunrise of Colombia on Westwood.
Then there was Sam, shaking hands spilling his stash.
He ended up snorting it off the filthy men’s room floor.
I mean, really.
How low can you go?
Try cocaine and you’ll find out.
© 2011 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Writer’s Island wanted Celebration poems. This one is lighter of heart than my last… guess who I am?
READY, SET, BLOW
I started off so fulsome
carefully dressed in white
that clung to my body
like Travolta’s ice cream suit.
OW! That burns,
but I am comforted by kisses
lips caressing me,
I am passed from friend to friend.
I’m the life of the party.
Aglow, the star of the show,
as the lava lamp flows,
bloop… bloop… bloop…
Minutes later, spent.
They’ve used me until I’m
a scrap of my former self
Now, the final indignity.
Out comes the roach clip
to pierce my remains.
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Previously published at Poetic Asides
At Three Word Wednesday, we were given: Buckle, Evade, and Wedge. OK, I fudged a bit on “wedge,” but art requires slight adaptations here and there… Enjoy! (You probably won’t if you were ever subjected to this bullying.)
WEDGIES
The ultimate teenaged bully stupid stunt.
Grab the nerd by his buckle
so he cannot evade this torture
Then pull on his underwear waistband. Hard.
Next to swirlies (those delightful dunks
headfirst in a flushed toilet, which can be
perpetrated on either gender), performing wedgies
is the sign of the true moron.
The wedgie-wanton often become
successful used-car salesmen and
captains of dart leagues at beer-soaked bars.
They rarely, if ever, get laid… let alone married (for long).
© 2010 Amy Barlow Liberatore/Sharp Little Pencil
Sharp Little Pencil 